I went to catch a movie yesterday night called the 300. It’s a movie about history and of the Persian and Spartan empires, of good looking and macho men with courage and intelligence. One particular scene caught my attention. It’s a scene when the Queen of Sparta, Leonidas’s wife gave a speech before an assembly of men and spoke eloquently and confidently and wisely about Spartan’s 300 men who went for war. Well, I thought she looked really beautiful in that scene and I like it very much that the movie portrayed this intelligent woman as the wife of a very successful, brave, intelligent and honourable king. She was not trying to take over her husband’s glory and place on the throne but complimented the husband in every way and supported him in his absence with the charm and intelligence she had.
Before you close this window or switch to reading my other posts, let me assure you that this is not going to be another feminist post or some girl who has nothing better to do but to fight for more equality. No…not here to do any of that. I just can’t help wondering if successful / intelligent men will find their intelligent wives intimidating or a crown of glory for them?
I wonder.
Do men like intelligent women? Women who can think, formed their own opinions (and I mean very mature, articulated opinions) and are independent. A girl who is certain of what she wants, how she goes about getting it and a girl who has strings of achievements in her past and still working for more. Do men want these women as their girl friends, wives and mothers of their children? Can men take it if you sit next to your wife and all attention is on her and your big bosses prefer to talk to her than to you because they are attracted to her intelligence and impressed with her oral skills and you are still proud of her? Can men sit and watch their politician wives give fantastic speeches and still clap and cheer for her? Can men handle a wife who can argue (and when I say argue that doesn’t mean quarrel, just getting in to an intellectual discourse) and formulate very mature and articulate arguments about certain issues and enjoy engaging with her arguments? And if you are a man of equal importance and who possess a string of achievements as well, will you feel threatened having to live in the shadow of your girl friend in the public square or in the small social circle? I wonder, I wonder, I wonder.
Or will men consider intelligence found in these women – SEXY? Will they be proud of her and feel really good about themselves because these women choose to be with them and not any other men?
OR
Do men prefer women who doesn’t know much and allow you to lead her and pamper her and each time you ask her a question a reply you will likely get is, “I don’t know, darling … you’re the smart one”. (Although I think many intelligent women do that pretentiously just so their husbands / boyfriends can feel smart for a split second).
If not, I think intelligent girls may not find themselves a suitable partner. The intelligent guys find them too intimidating and the not-so-intelligent ones (I’m trying very hard here to be politically correct) find them difficult to connect with.
A very intelligent girl friend of mine said this: “It’s almost like a curse if we are intelligent”.
What ya think?
Thursday, March 15, 2007
Friday, March 9, 2007
6 months~!!!!
I wanted to put this post up much later on the 18th which marks the exact date of which I officially walked into my first job 6 months ago. But I am just too impatient and too excited to want to thank all these wonderful people who has helped me throughout my job application process and throughout my 6 months. Life is so good with them around. Here is the list of people I want to thank:
1) The Bishop and his wife for their great hospitality, care and prayers during my stay in KL for this interview
2) Pei Hsien for your sms that early morning before I left for the interview
3) Aunty Constance for her help in all that I needed to get my job done
4) Lee Sin for advising me on the Do’s and Don’ts in the working life
5) To all the EHC members who have prayed for me
6) To SY, who called all the way from Singapore to encourage me to apply to McKinsey and for sharing with me about the life there
7) To Cheemeng for his advice on L’oreal
8) Shakira for her advice on Shell
9) Peejay Garcia for being a good listener, for believing in me, for advising me on DHL and other consulting firms and above all for being with me even in my worst moments
10) To my aunt of whom I lived with during the first 5 weeks of my working life
11) To ZiBin who edited my essay. For if not for your help, it wouldn’t have got to where it is
12) Siew family for their constant love and support and to Elaine, for your encouraging words and confidence in me
13) My lovely parents for their unfailing love, and belief in my abilities
14) YL, for his guidance since the first day of my job application process, for his prayers which so touched my heart, for his mock interviews, for his words of encouragement when I needed them the most and his sage advice, his tips on the McKinsey interviews and for sharing his resources. I will not forget this one meaningful sms he sent when I was on the way to the McKinsey office, with fears chocking up my neck: “Just prayed for you. Trust not in your emotions, but on the promises of God” (This line still rings in my mind each time I am overwhelmed by emotions) and finally for all he has done and the care he has shown throughout this 6 months. Without you, I wouldn't have found myself here. My blessing to have known you as the first person who walked into my life when I began this new chapter. You have so much and achieved so much, yet you gave it all and enveloped yourself with so much humility. Thank you, again!
15) To everyone who in one way or another helped me with my career and job application process and also who has taught me life’s little lessons. Thank you all!
16) Finally, thank God from whom all blessings flow. The God who sees to my every need and the God who shapes my character and the God who wants to give me the best. Thank you, God!
1) The Bishop and his wife for their great hospitality, care and prayers during my stay in KL for this interview
2) Pei Hsien for your sms that early morning before I left for the interview
3) Aunty Constance for her help in all that I needed to get my job done
4) Lee Sin for advising me on the Do’s and Don’ts in the working life
5) To all the EHC members who have prayed for me
6) To SY, who called all the way from Singapore to encourage me to apply to McKinsey and for sharing with me about the life there
7) To Cheemeng for his advice on L’oreal
8) Shakira for her advice on Shell
9) Peejay Garcia for being a good listener, for believing in me, for advising me on DHL and other consulting firms and above all for being with me even in my worst moments
10) To my aunt of whom I lived with during the first 5 weeks of my working life
11) To ZiBin who edited my essay. For if not for your help, it wouldn’t have got to where it is
12) Siew family for their constant love and support and to Elaine, for your encouraging words and confidence in me
13) My lovely parents for their unfailing love, and belief in my abilities
14) YL, for his guidance since the first day of my job application process, for his prayers which so touched my heart, for his mock interviews, for his words of encouragement when I needed them the most and his sage advice, his tips on the McKinsey interviews and for sharing his resources. I will not forget this one meaningful sms he sent when I was on the way to the McKinsey office, with fears chocking up my neck: “Just prayed for you. Trust not in your emotions, but on the promises of God” (This line still rings in my mind each time I am overwhelmed by emotions) and finally for all he has done and the care he has shown throughout this 6 months. Without you, I wouldn't have found myself here. My blessing to have known you as the first person who walked into my life when I began this new chapter. You have so much and achieved so much, yet you gave it all and enveloped yourself with so much humility. Thank you, again!
15) To everyone who in one way or another helped me with my career and job application process and also who has taught me life’s little lessons. Thank you all!
16) Finally, thank God from whom all blessings flow. The God who sees to my every need and the God who shapes my character and the God who wants to give me the best. Thank you, God!
Thursday, March 8, 2007
I was on His mind
It has been a almost six months since I started with the first official job of my life! Phew…how time flies. Many things have changed since that day and looking back I have God to thank for.
I still remember vividly the first day I walked into this office for my interview – the fear, the excitement, the curiosity, the warm pat on the shoulders by my friend and the words of encouragement he gave, the intimidating questions, the mind boggling puzzles, the air, the scent, the worry, every thought. Oh all still so vivid in my memory!
It was a great 6 months. I met so many people, learned so many things and learned so much about myself too. Although not every day is a rosy day, it was through those not-so-rosy days that I truly learned about life and myself. This has been the industry I wanted so much to be in when I was studying in the university and so far I still have no regrets. I am not sure what the next 6 months will hold for me but I will trust the God who holds my future and who pays attention to shaping every detail in my life. Recalling the past 6 months, it reminded me again about how I am so enveloped by God’s love - seeing my every need is taken care of and ensuring that I am taught the lessons He wants me to learn and above all for placing CDPC as my family here in PJ/KL, people that I can always fall back to.
Here’s a song by Hillsong, I’d learned to love. A high school mate wrote it on the school blackboard one morning during my high school days and I just ignored her and the lyrics of the song (thinking she must be silly or too emotional). It rang again when I was watching a play at DUMC about a year ago. Now it meant so much to me, ever since I begin my working life and all the experiences I had, living here in PJ and KL. I hope it will do the same to you:
Before the world began,
You were on His mind,
And every tear you cry is precious in His eyes,
Because of His great love, He gave His only son,
Everything was done…so you would come.
Come to the Father,
Though your gift is small,
Broken hearts, broken lives,
He will take them all,
The power of the Word,
The power of His blood,
Everything was done so you would come.
Nothing you can do to make Him love you more,
And nothing that you’ve done could make Him close the door,
Because of His great love, He gave His only son
Everything was done so you would come.
I still remember vividly the first day I walked into this office for my interview – the fear, the excitement, the curiosity, the warm pat on the shoulders by my friend and the words of encouragement he gave, the intimidating questions, the mind boggling puzzles, the air, the scent, the worry, every thought. Oh all still so vivid in my memory!
It was a great 6 months. I met so many people, learned so many things and learned so much about myself too. Although not every day is a rosy day, it was through those not-so-rosy days that I truly learned about life and myself. This has been the industry I wanted so much to be in when I was studying in the university and so far I still have no regrets. I am not sure what the next 6 months will hold for me but I will trust the God who holds my future and who pays attention to shaping every detail in my life. Recalling the past 6 months, it reminded me again about how I am so enveloped by God’s love - seeing my every need is taken care of and ensuring that I am taught the lessons He wants me to learn and above all for placing CDPC as my family here in PJ/KL, people that I can always fall back to.
Here’s a song by Hillsong, I’d learned to love. A high school mate wrote it on the school blackboard one morning during my high school days and I just ignored her and the lyrics of the song (thinking she must be silly or too emotional). It rang again when I was watching a play at DUMC about a year ago. Now it meant so much to me, ever since I begin my working life and all the experiences I had, living here in PJ and KL. I hope it will do the same to you:
Before the world began,
You were on His mind,
And every tear you cry is precious in His eyes,
Because of His great love, He gave His only son,
Everything was done…so you would come.
Come to the Father,
Though your gift is small,
Broken hearts, broken lives,
He will take them all,
The power of the Word,
The power of His blood,
Everything was done so you would come.
Nothing you can do to make Him love you more,
And nothing that you’ve done could make Him close the door,
Because of His great love, He gave His only son
Everything was done so you would come.
Friday, February 23, 2007
Which Are You?
One of my favourite poems. Heard it when it was read by a Director in McKinsey & Co. and immediately fell in love with it.
WHICH ARE YOU?
THERE are two kinds of people on earth to-day;
Just two kinds of people, no more, I say.
Not the sinner and saint, for it's well understood,
The good are half bad, and the bad are half good.
Not the rich and the poor, for to rate a man's wealth,
You must first know the state of his conscience and health.
Not the humble and proud, for in life's little span,
Who puts on vain airs, is not counted a man.
Not the happy and sad, for the swift flying years
Bring each man his laughter and each man his tears.
No; the two kinds of people on earth I mean,
Are the people who lift, and the people who lean.
Wherever you go, you will find the earth's masses,
Are always divided in just these two classes.
And oddly enough, you will find too, I ween,
There's only one lifter to twenty who lean.
In which class are you? Are you easing the load,
Of overtaxed lifters, who toil down the road?
Or are you a leaner, who lets others share
Your portion of labor, and worry and care?
~Ella Wheeler Wilcox~
Dedicated to all those who are my lifters.....You have all been truly great friends and my rarest of jewels.
WHICH ARE YOU?
THERE are two kinds of people on earth to-day;
Just two kinds of people, no more, I say.
Not the sinner and saint, for it's well understood,
The good are half bad, and the bad are half good.
Not the rich and the poor, for to rate a man's wealth,
You must first know the state of his conscience and health.
Not the humble and proud, for in life's little span,
Who puts on vain airs, is not counted a man.
Not the happy and sad, for the swift flying years
Bring each man his laughter and each man his tears.
No; the two kinds of people on earth I mean,
Are the people who lift, and the people who lean.
Wherever you go, you will find the earth's masses,
Are always divided in just these two classes.
And oddly enough, you will find too, I ween,
There's only one lifter to twenty who lean.
In which class are you? Are you easing the load,
Of overtaxed lifters, who toil down the road?
Or are you a leaner, who lets others share
Your portion of labor, and worry and care?
~Ella Wheeler Wilcox~
Dedicated to all those who are my lifters.....You have all been truly great friends and my rarest of jewels.
Thursday, February 22, 2007
Mirage
MIRAGE
The hope I dreamed of was a dream,
Was but a dream; and now I wake
Exceeding comfortless, and worn, and old,
For a dream's sake.
I hang my harp upon a tree,
A weeping willow in a lake;
I hang my silenced harp there, wrung and snapt
For a dream's sake.
Lie still, lie still, my breaking heart;
My silent heart, lie still and break:
Life, and the world, and mine own self, are changed
For a dream's sake.
~Christina Rossetti (1830-1894)~
Happy Chinese New Year to everyone and Happy Valentine's day (belated)!
The hope I dreamed of was a dream,
Was but a dream; and now I wake
Exceeding comfortless, and worn, and old,
For a dream's sake.
I hang my harp upon a tree,
A weeping willow in a lake;
I hang my silenced harp there, wrung and snapt
For a dream's sake.
Lie still, lie still, my breaking heart;
My silent heart, lie still and break:
Life, and the world, and mine own self, are changed
For a dream's sake.
~Christina Rossetti (1830-1894)~
Happy Chinese New Year to everyone and Happy Valentine's day (belated)!
Wednesday, February 7, 2007
The C-word~!!!!
The C-word!
Ouch, don't mention it again! Taboo?
Today, I bumped into a friend on the train whom I have not met for months. Well, we were happy to meet each other again(since I have only met him once when a friend took me out to meet his university friends) and the conversation on the train went well until that C-word reared its head out once awhile from my friend's lips....issshhhhh!!!
One girl friend of mine and I never really liked that word, mainly because we get so sick of hearing it. And for me, I tend to associate it with my broken dreams.Hence, it becomes a word I so adamantly don't want to hear.
I first heard of the C-word when I was 3. My mom used to tell me how difficult it was to get an English cert during her time from C******** and how getting in to C******** was difficult and how it was exclusive only to the very intelligent and bright people. That day, I told myself I would work hard and ensure that I will get in to C********* (Ah, a little girl's naive dream). As I grew older, C*********'s dream seemed to wither away as I learned that a lot of financial support was needed in order to get in to C*********. So no C******** for me nor any other foreign universities. There goes one broken dream.....
Another broken dream is when I didn't make it to my dream company, which has a lot of C-word people in it. And another broken dream is when...err...well, that one I'll keep for private space conversations. Hehehe....
p/s: To those who have built your dreams around C******** and then for one reason or another, they didn't materialize, take heart! There are still many dreams waiting to be fulfilled.
To the friend whom I bumped into today on the train, it was great seeing you again and I definitely enjoy the conversation we had. I do admire your university a lot, as much as I admire the people who have graduated from there. You are all truly remarkable in your own ways. Hope we'll meet again for yam cha.
Ouch, don't mention it again! Taboo?
No...just a word I associate with broken dreams..
Today, I bumped into a friend on the train whom I have not met for months. Well, we were happy to meet each other again(since I have only met him once when a friend took me out to meet his university friends) and the conversation on the train went well until that C-word reared its head out once awhile from my friend's lips....issshhhhh!!!
One girl friend of mine and I never really liked that word, mainly because we get so sick of hearing it. And for me, I tend to associate it with my broken dreams.Hence, it becomes a word I so adamantly don't want to hear.
I first heard of the C-word when I was 3. My mom used to tell me how difficult it was to get an English cert during her time from C******** and how getting in to C******** was difficult and how it was exclusive only to the very intelligent and bright people. That day, I told myself I would work hard and ensure that I will get in to C********* (Ah, a little girl's naive dream). As I grew older, C*********'s dream seemed to wither away as I learned that a lot of financial support was needed in order to get in to C*********. So no C******** for me nor any other foreign universities. There goes one broken dream.....
Another broken dream is when I didn't make it to my dream company, which has a lot of C-word people in it. And another broken dream is when...err...well, that one I'll keep for private space conversations. Hehehe....
p/s: To those who have built your dreams around C******** and then for one reason or another, they didn't materialize, take heart! There are still many dreams waiting to be fulfilled.
To the friend whom I bumped into today on the train, it was great seeing you again and I definitely enjoy the conversation we had. I do admire your university a lot, as much as I admire the people who have graduated from there. You are all truly remarkable in your own ways. Hope we'll meet again for yam cha.
Monday, February 5, 2007
Wedding Bells!
Wedding bells?
Mine?
Not yet.
Just over the weekend, I was attending Ken and Shireen's wedding in Penang. A red and passionate beach wedding. The couple entertained their guests with a splendid performance of what I would call a unique and sizzling hot dance, depicting their courtship. The climax of the day came when the couple exchanged their vows and the setting sun shone on them as they presented each other with a ring that would seal their marriage for life. (Ahh...how lovely!!!)
Ken's love story has encouraged me to trust God even more when it comes to marriage. Seeing how God has written so many interesting and great love stories for the couples in my church and observing how happy they are right now in serving God faithfully as husband and wife, it definitely gave me a fresh new perspective about the God who is the author of our lives. I believe God has carefully designed every detail in our lives, including who we meet, when we meet them, how we meet them, what events - successes, failures, death, the magnitude of each impact, everything! They are all carefully crafted by God with love. If only we can place that complete trust in Him and let go....He will lead us to the best He wants us to have.
As I watched Ken and Shireen gazed at each other's eyes, and was recalling the story Ken shared, I can't help thinking about the song Sarah introduced to me and promised to sing on my wedding day - When God made you.
It has always been a mystery to me
How two hearts can come together
And love can last forever
And now that I have found you, I believe
That a miracle has come
When God sends the perfect one
Now gone are all my questions about why
And I've never been so sure of anything in my life....
I wonder what God was thinking
When He created you
I wonder if He knew everything I would need
Because He made all my dreams come true
When God made you, He must have been thinking about me...
When God made me, He must have been thinking about you....
Wouldn't you like to have the God of love and the God who created love writes you a love story?
Mine?
Not yet.
Just over the weekend, I was attending Ken and Shireen's wedding in Penang. A red and passionate beach wedding. The couple entertained their guests with a splendid performance of what I would call a unique and sizzling hot dance, depicting their courtship. The climax of the day came when the couple exchanged their vows and the setting sun shone on them as they presented each other with a ring that would seal their marriage for life. (Ahh...how lovely!!!)
Ken's love story has encouraged me to trust God even more when it comes to marriage. Seeing how God has written so many interesting and great love stories for the couples in my church and observing how happy they are right now in serving God faithfully as husband and wife, it definitely gave me a fresh new perspective about the God who is the author of our lives. I believe God has carefully designed every detail in our lives, including who we meet, when we meet them, how we meet them, what events - successes, failures, death, the magnitude of each impact, everything! They are all carefully crafted by God with love. If only we can place that complete trust in Him and let go....He will lead us to the best He wants us to have.
As I watched Ken and Shireen gazed at each other's eyes, and was recalling the story Ken shared, I can't help thinking about the song Sarah introduced to me and promised to sing on my wedding day - When God made you.
It has always been a mystery to me
How two hearts can come together
And love can last forever
And now that I have found you, I believe
That a miracle has come
When God sends the perfect one
Now gone are all my questions about why
And I've never been so sure of anything in my life....
I wonder what God was thinking
When He created you
I wonder if He knew everything I would need
Because He made all my dreams come true
When God made you, He must have been thinking about me...
When God made me, He must have been thinking about you....
Wouldn't you like to have the God of love and the God who created love writes you a love story?
Sam, Me, Ken, Shireen and Sarah
With the bride
The red, chilly hot people
Friday, January 26, 2007
The God of Favouritism?
I hear so often of other people's lives, vociferously declaring of the successes and blessings they have received. A Cambridge education, a big house, healthy parents, happy family, wealth in an abundant supply, international career opportunities, favour from bosses and colleagues, good looks, hot girls / guys as their girlfriends / boyfriends ..... and the list goes on...
Sounds familiar? Definitely! When I was a child, I read about my favourite Bible character King David, the man after God's heart...He was blessed with everything - wealth, health, skills, looks, wisdom, safety, victory and even a throne and the entire country was his! As much as I admire him, I also struggled with the thought that God really favored him over many other people in the world. This has led me to think, will God favor some other Christians more than me? Will He love them more than me and endow upon them rich gifts and blessings?
If another Christian gets his heart's desires and things are all working out for him....does that mean that this person loves God more than I do, hence received more blessings? At the threshold of this thought, I instantly felt insecure and got myself into a web of more confusing questions. Thankfully, Pastor Wong came to the rescue. Here are the few things that entirely clear my doubts and misconceptions and things I have learnt:
1) God gives good things to all His children according to His infinite wisdom.
That means if He thinks going to that dream company of yours is going to make you proud and that you might drift away from Him and ultimately harm you, He will definitely not give it to you even though that seems like a blessing to you.
2) God's love is not measured based on how much we love Him or how godly we are or how much time we have been committed to His ministries.
He loves us uncondtionally, and remember He first loved us. Blessings is not measured by how much you love God or how many good things you have done.
3) Not having all those good things or your dreams doesn't always mean you are not blessed.
Pain can be a blessing, hardships can be one too if God uses it to shape who He wants you to be. God doesn't bless people based on what we would define as blessings.
and the last thing I learned...
4) Sometimes having all those good things may not always mean that the person is blessed.
We are only looking at things from the surface and even if he is blessed, that's a good thing. All the more we should rejoice with him instead of dwelling in some shallow jealousy.
Looking back, I know I am blessed in so many ways. Instead of wallowing in the pool of jealousy, I am learning to be grateful each day for the little, humble and simple things in life. I know very well that my Master takes good care of me.
Sounds familiar? Definitely! When I was a child, I read about my favourite Bible character King David, the man after God's heart...He was blessed with everything - wealth, health, skills, looks, wisdom, safety, victory and even a throne and the entire country was his! As much as I admire him, I also struggled with the thought that God really favored him over many other people in the world. This has led me to think, will God favor some other Christians more than me? Will He love them more than me and endow upon them rich gifts and blessings?
If another Christian gets his heart's desires and things are all working out for him....does that mean that this person loves God more than I do, hence received more blessings? At the threshold of this thought, I instantly felt insecure and got myself into a web of more confusing questions. Thankfully, Pastor Wong came to the rescue. Here are the few things that entirely clear my doubts and misconceptions and things I have learnt:
1) God gives good things to all His children according to His infinite wisdom.
That means if He thinks going to that dream company of yours is going to make you proud and that you might drift away from Him and ultimately harm you, He will definitely not give it to you even though that seems like a blessing to you.
2) God's love is not measured based on how much we love Him or how godly we are or how much time we have been committed to His ministries.
He loves us uncondtionally, and remember He first loved us. Blessings is not measured by how much you love God or how many good things you have done.
3) Not having all those good things or your dreams doesn't always mean you are not blessed.
Pain can be a blessing, hardships can be one too if God uses it to shape who He wants you to be. God doesn't bless people based on what we would define as blessings.
and the last thing I learned...
4) Sometimes having all those good things may not always mean that the person is blessed.
We are only looking at things from the surface and even if he is blessed, that's a good thing. All the more we should rejoice with him instead of dwelling in some shallow jealousy.
Looking back, I know I am blessed in so many ways. Instead of wallowing in the pool of jealousy, I am learning to be grateful each day for the little, humble and simple things in life. I know very well that my Master takes good care of me.
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